Street football in Nigeria: Monkey Post

Football, the go-to sport for many Nigerians. You would do well to find other countries within Africa with an ever-burning passion for the sport, as Nigerians have. For football, Nigerians regardless of the age group would do practically anything: from hanging around viewing centres (I once sat on a fence in the dead of night to watch an EPL game), to making “paper ball” made with the fusion of sheets of paper (mostly used school notes) to the popular four-post game played in classrooms, table soccer, kolo beating, O.G.O., one touch, two touch are also commonplace. Football to Nigerians has become second nature, and the most popular of them all is the street football, otherwise termed monkey post.

All over the country, little kids and even adults play monkey post. I still remember adults gathering during environmental sanitation to play football on the streets. Unlike the standard football match, street football has little perquisites to play the game.

 You may ask, what’s monkey post? Probably a term you haven’t heard on television.

Monkey post is the Nigerian term for “5-a-side football.” But unlike the traditional 5-a-side football that’s played indoors or on grass pitches, monkey post is played anywhere on school fields, the stretch of land in people’s compound, streets, and even on the expressway!

Also played with any kind of football, from “felele” ball that when hit, swerves all over the place to “health” with a size 4 or 5, which is the de facto ball for games, and it doesn’t swerve all over. However, players hope that the ball, when hit, doesn’t go smash someone’s window or windshield. Goalposts for the monkey post game are made using stones, blocks, tyres, and even slippers. Miniature goalposts are sometimes used as well. To ensure equity, the goalposts are measured using foot count.

Now that you know a bit about the monkey post game, let’s continue with street football.

Street football is usually played with three to five players on each team termed “set” but mostly four or five, depending on the size of the pitch and the number of people available to form another “set.” The number of goals to be scored to allow another set play is usually determined, and it’s almost always a low ranging number from 1 to 2. There are no goalies in monkey post; the player manning the post is to use his feet in place of his hands, and shots are to be parried using the feet.

Street football is all about quick thinking, quick passes, finesse over power, close control, strength, understanding among teammates. Talented players are usually picked first, and some people pick players that have played a lot, making them the “Liverpool or Manchester City” of the set, notoriously difficult to defeat.

Anyone who plays or watches as a spectator immediately notices some talented players. There is a choice of words, which can only be found on football street.

Here’s a quick rundown of some used words:

1. I1 and i2...: These are the people who pick whoever will be on their team. Find yourself lucky to be here, and you also must pick players that give you the best chance of winning.

2. Buu dé: A Yoruba term which means “clear into row Z.” When you hear this, they’re telling the player to play the ball anywhere as far as it prevents the opponent from having the ball.

3. Kolo: This is when the ball is slotted in between a player’s legs, most often as a dribble.

4. Show me your number: A fake shot, or “cutting” that leaves the opponent going the other direction. Also called “Kooba”

5. Escobar: For non-football fans, we are certainly not referring to “Pablo Escobar.” Escobar here means that an own goal has been scored. A funny situation but also one of ignominy, especially if your team was in the ascendancy.

6. Force them to play nonsense: Street football's term for a high press. It means to pressure the opponent immediately to force them to make mistakes.

7. High ball: Since street football doesn’t always use goalposts with a crossbar, players have a responsibility of imagining where the crossbar is. Playing a ball that supposedly hoses over the imaginary crossbar is called a high ball and doesn’t count as a goal.

8. Parallel: The opposite of a high ball. It means that the ball rolled straight on the ground with no levitation. And it counts as a goal.

9. Sangalo: Also called an overhead kick or bicycle kick. Whoever scores this successfully writes his name into the field’s folklore and is talked about for quite a while.

10. Follow me: Remember Okocha? Follow me is the street term for a rainbow flick.

Every country has footballers who came through playing this beautiful street game, and in, either way influences their style of play and gives them that toughness: mental and physical. I hope you enjoyed reading this post and do stay with us because we have more coming.